Surreal
by icyboots
Summary: "It's the highlight of my week to be honest; finding out what sort of weirdos you got this time." AU. ASC. Oneshot for Tobirion.


My fifth contribution for cloud's birthday week 2k14 challenge. For the ever-lovely Tobirion ;]

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><p><strong>Surreal<br>**

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><p>"Let me guess: the date was a flop."<p>

Angeal gave a wry smile at that, swirling his drink thoughtfully the moment Cloud, the bartender, finished pouring it. "His passion for magic would've been charming if he wasn't so bad at it. Almost cutting Sephiroth in half didn't help either."

He could remember it like yesterday; the night where he asked Sephiroth out, Sephiroth accepting with a raised eyebrow — so maybe the flowers were pushing it. It was the start of a surprisingly secure, satisfying relationship, one that made him rethink of the stigma romantic relationships formed between childhood friends held. Now, two years later, both of them were still happily together, and it appeared that it would remain that way for — hopefully — a long time.

Still, that didn't mean that they didn't try new things every once and a while. Angeal couldn't count the ideas both of them conjured up during their time together anymore, and their current one wasn't a different case at all.

It all started when Zack, a mutual friend of theirs, started going out with both of his co-workers — whose names were Kunsel and Cissnei, he remembered — at once, upon being asked answering that it was an agreed-upon arrangement — a Happy Threeway, as he called.

Witnessing that, without the other knowing, they began thinking of including a third party to their relationship, the pros and cons of it. As the days and weeks passed, the pros were outweighing the cons, the allure the novelty of the experience held urging them on. A couple of months later, they confronted each other, surprised and undeniably pleased that they had the same idea in the wake of that.

So they started looking for suitable candidates. Their childhood friend, Genesis, first came to mind, but then they remembered that he was quite happy in his single life, expressing many times his lack of desire to commit himself to a relationship. They were sure that, if asked, Genesis would've agreed, but how long it would take for him to tire of it? And were they willing to risk their friendship for something that couldn't be guaranteed?

Probably not long for the first, and probably no for the second.

Other candidates were the same — co-workers and friends alike, and it was then that Angeal and Sephiroth realized that they were looking in the wrong direction. At least, that was how their boss, one President Shinra, put it before directing them to a dating site.

They weren't sure who informed him of this, and they weren't sure if they _wanted_ to know why he cared enough to try and help let alone his knowledge of the site.

At first, the premise of the site sounded nice enough; going on blind dates with new people who shared the same preferences. There were no pictures attached to the users' profiles, so selecting one based on their interests was the only way to go. It was exciting, in a way.

The excitement, however, decreased dramatically when their first date turned out to be a self-proclaimed 'tomb-collector'.

He remembered turning to Sephiroth, firmly telling him that he was erasing 'interested in history' from their profile.

The next dates didn't fare any better, every single one of them weirder than the next. By this point, Angeal was sure they were doing this just to see what they'd get — like buying random candy flavor expecting it to turn out strawberry-flavored one day, only to get lemon again and again and _again_.

The upside of this, at least, was that they learned of a nice bar — not too crowded, and blessedly not utterly rundown — next to the restaurant they went to for their dates. It _really_ helped that the bartender who had the night shift — whose name they discovered to be Cloud when they told their tales of woe after having a couple of drinks too much on their second time there — was rather… _attractive,_ preparing their usual with an amused smile when he saw them enter the bar. It was his job, Angeal knew, but he sometimes liked to think that he was giving them a special treatment, and maybe he was; he did seem to be rather entertained at their expense.

"It's the highlight of my week to be honest; finding out what sort of weirdos you got this time." Angeal remembered him saying, a laugh evident in his voice.

"You can go ahead and erase 'magic' from our interests," Sephiroth said when he finally came back from the bathroom, sitting in the stool next to him with less grace than the usual, and looking mournfully at the now _very_ uneven locks of his hair.

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><p>"For once, we got a normal one," Angeal announced before sitting on his assigned stool.<p>

"If only he didn't sigh 'whatever' _every_ time we spoke." Sephiroth wasn't the most intolerant person around — he was friends with Zack and Genesis, after all — but even he wouldn't put up with someone who appeared to be wanting to be anywhere but with them. Actually, now that he thought about it, he concluded that their date was doing it on _purpose_.

Cloud snorted. "The fact that you're proud about that after, what, ten dates? Is pathetically hilarious." Handing them their drinks, he asked, "Have you considered trying another site?"

Angeal nodded. "We did."

"And it's the same," Sephiroth continued for him.

"Well, I'll cheer for you regardless." The smile Cloud had was more sincere than amused, and suddenly Sephiroth realized that Cloud didn't smile much aside from when he was talking to Tifa, the owner of the bar and his few other friends that sometimes frequented it.

Perhaps he considered them as friends, he mused, or perhaps, as a part of him secretly wished, something other than that — close but different in nature.

From the corner of his eye, he saw Angeal smiling back, his eyes warm with fondness, and Sephiroth knew he wasn't the only one who wished the same.

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><p>This time, it was a man unsettlingly interested in spiders.<p>

As soon as he revealed that his trench coat was crawling with them, Angeal and Sephiroth were out of there, not once looking back.

They were seriously getting somewhat tired of this — the array of unusual dates taking its toll on them.

If they had to be frank, the only thing they got out of this ordeal was the Seventh Heaven and, as a result, Cloud. Grumpy, kind, a bit of a punk, supportive, a bit of a shorty, attractively disheveled with the brightest blue ey—

And it hit them. If the weirdos were at least as charming as Cloud, they wouldn't have minded it much.

Gaia, instead of their blind _dates_, they wanted to date _Cloud._

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><p>The revelation did nothing to change things, however.<p>

So they were looking to include a third person into their relationship. So they happened to like Cloud and think of him as that possible third person. So what?

Despite getting to know each other, they'd still yet to know if Cloud was dating anyone — if he was interested in them aside from their wishful thinking. Even if he was supportive, who knew what his reaction would be to the idea being applied to himself?

And they still had five more dates to go, anyway.

This time, their date was one who was interested in 'extreme sports'.

They would've whimpered if they could.

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><p>Extreme Sports, as they dubbed, turned out to be none other than Cloud.<p>

"I knew, I just _knew_ he was too good to be true," Angeal said, taking a page from Genesis. It was a statement that Sephiroth echoed in expression.

Cloud, for his part, looked rather shocked. "When I checked that possible-multi option, I never expected you guys."

"We never expected _you_."

Silence.

The three of them were just… standing there, willing for any of them to act first.

Fortunately, the waiter decided to spare them the conflict, bringing their attention to their reserved table with a clear of throat.

"So…" Cloud started, smiling awkwardly.

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><p>Cloud, deciding to try and see what dates he could have — if he could meet a pair as wonderful as them, he admitted — made a profile on a dating site, never expecting it to be the one they were using the latest.<p>

Cloud often told them that they had the worst luck in getting dates, and in normal cases, they would've agreed.

In this case, though, they hit the jack-pot.

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><p>Cloud's entry to their relationship was as awkward yet endearing as one could be. Two months later, he still wasn't used to it, but he was gradually learning — now even leaving some of his stuff in their apartment the way they did to his.<p>

As far as a Happy Threeway went, they were certainly happy.

"By the way, Cloud, you never told us what extreme sports you're into."

Upon receiving the answer — complete with a map of the best places to climb the Great Glacier and a thorough how-to guide to Chocobo breeding and racing — Angeal and Sephiroth concluded that indeed, they were dating a weirdo.

Then again, Cloud was a weirdo they were perfectly content with.


End file.
